15 April, 2014

A girl in my Sociology class turns around during a class activity on goals to start a conversation with me. Her opening line is: ‘I want to get married.’ I nod and smile. She does not ask me my goals, just continues telling me the sort of guy she’d like to be with and how many kids she’d like. Thoughtfully, she adds, ‘My mom told me to meet someone and marry them. You don’t wanna date around because you wanna be fresh for the guy and not a….you know what.’

My cousin’s Facebook ‘About Me’ lists things she would like in a man. There is nothing about her or the things she does, only qualities she finds attractive. ‘Looking for someone who can play the guitar and cook a great dinner,’ she wrote. I can hear her bubbly, singsong voice while reading it. She is thirteen years old and has told me that girls ‘oughta only kiss their husbands and that’s it.’ When I ask her what she wants to be when she’s older she says, ‘Married.’

My male friend tells me that he has no problem with what girls do, but that he would not date a girl who’s ‘been around’ because she’d be ‘dirty.’ I wonder if each time someone touches you, a part of you is soiled. If there are piles of dirt in the spaces where others’ fingers once rested. In the shower, I try to scrub the smell of dirt from myself, but come out, still polluted, with red scratch marks all over me.

Being called a ‘you know what’ taught me some things: that I do not want to be touched by somebody who will judge my past. That I am not a tally book, with others’ names burned into me. If you have to label me as something, let it be a human being.

A “You Know What” | Lora Mathis 
A middle finger to slut shaming.  (via lora-mathis)A HUGE MIDDLE FINGER

(via brokenmachine)

15 April, 2014

Most men never think about patriarchy—what it means, how it is created and sustained. Many men in our nation would not be able to spell the word or pronounce it correctly. The word “patriarchy” just is not a part of their normal everyday thought or speech. Men who have heard and know the word usually associate it with women’s liberation, with feminism, and therefore dismiss it as irrelevant to their own experiences. I have been standing at podiums talking about patriarchy for more than thirty years. It is a word I use daily, and men who hear me use it often ask me what I mean by it.

Nothing discounts the old antifeminist projection of men as all-powerful more than their basic ignorance of a major facet of the political system that shapes and informs male identity and sense of self from birth until death.

— bell hooks, “Understanding Patriachy” (via heteroglossia)

(via linzo)

15 April, 2014

I give a fuck. I give lots of fucks, actually. I’m a prostitute of feelings.

— (via girlsjunk)

(Source: nylonpinksy, via bahhhhboon)

15 April, 2014

(Source: fishnetchickadee, via psych0nautilus)

15 April, 2014

(Source: traipevatrai, via alicesthirdeye)

11 April, 2014

Always trust your own feeling, rather than others’ discussions, interpretations and arguments. Should you be mistaken, then slowly and with time the natural growth of your inner life will bring you to fuller awareness.

— Rainer Maria Rilke, from Letters To A Young Poet (via violentwavesofemotion)

10 April, 2014

(via theodoreramirez)

10 April, 2014
honeydollydimples:

yamaiko:

Me acaban de violar el cerebro

I don’t understand what this person is saying but I f e e l it

honeydollydimples:

yamaiko:

Me acaban de violar el cerebro

I don’t understand what this person is saying but I f e e l it

(via theodoreramirez)

10 April, 2014

(Source: obsexxed, via thechosenpessimist420)

10 April, 2014

(via fromtheweirdtotheinsane)